I’m probably not alone when I say that the pandemic was the last drop for dying routines. By the beginning of 2020 I was already a little distant from my photographic practice. In the literal sense, I wasn’t practicing regularly. Not even not creating a big project, but also losing the habit of grabbing my camera and taking couple of pictures from time to time. That kind of work actually was key for any of my exhibitions, where I went through that constant slow work of years, rescuing photos here and there that together made up something.
In 2018 I had my first analog photography workshop, where we produced some silver gelatin prints in a home darkroom in Mouraria, in Lisbon. A tiny two-day workshop, where I took a million notes and enjoyed thoroughly. Unfortunately, the moment wasn’t right and I kept on shooting few films and being a little intimidated by the process. My good friend José Ferrero tutored me in every step of the film developing first, and then working in the darkroom. This happened during our visits to Spain – we’re based in İstanbul since 2019 so I didn’t have access to his great tips all the time.
And 2022 was the year to get a grip on the analog process myself. I started developing films at home in May and started shooting more often and with more intention. I couldn’t get better if I overthought if what I was shooting was worthed it, so I let loose. That summer I shot a lot. And I had troubles with my camera, a quick reminder that we’re in new territory and I’ll have to learn to deal with setbacks. Many photos were ruined because of overlapping. It’s always a sweet and sour feeling when you have an issue, but you finally discovered that it was not your fault. I persisted.
At the end of the summer, which we usually spend out of the city, I was obsessing about finding a darkroom I could rent to start printing the photos that I worked so hard to create. I was sure there’d be such a place in a huge city like İstanbul, but I stomped uppon the Internet in 2022, where it’s impossible to find what you want since it’s buried under lots of pages of aggregators and absolutely unrelated content. I managed to find a magazine interview with Selçuk Coşkun where he spoke about his passion for film photography and that he has a darkroom that he still rents, as part of his film development business. I got SO excited. I can remember it so clearly. It can be done, I can start. I had some weeks to re-learn everything so I could feel comfortable alone in the darkroom. I can remember clearly that first day working alone in the darkroom, in the vibrant area of Sirkeci of İstanbul.
Soon after I came across a community darkroom in the Art Residences of Arthere in Kadıköy. A little further away, but more economical and I was made feel at home from the beginning by Omar and Mehdi. Down in the basement, in a little tighter space but with everything I needed, I pushed through my first months of darkroom work, more or less constant, but still trying to have new rolls to print every time I was going.
Finally, I became a member of a great photography association called İFSAK, which located closer to my home, opened the doors of their darkroom to me. The darkroom wasn’t in fantastic shape due to being scarcely used, but it had everything I could dream of (and things I didn’t know what they were and I still discover them to this day). I slowly started feeling more confident in the new space, and managed to go regularly, organize it and create a workflow that allowed me to produce more work and improve exponentially. One of the other few regular users of the darkroom is my good friend Reyhan Mente. Go check her work, it’s fantastic, inspiring and couldn’t be more different from my own. The first day we worked together, after I was using my cotton gloves to manage my negatives, she started doing the negative manipulation that she does, where she burns, bends and scratches the material, from where then she makes silver gelatin copies.
I’ve written enough for this first entry. But I wanted to put into writing the cascade of work I’ve done in this last year that helped me fall in love again with my photographic practice (I still loved photography, I was just not producing it). I’m happy to inform that I am back, shotting regularly and creating final prints. This time it happens under the red light, with chemicals and completely away from screens.
